Lili Arboreen.I'm doing what I can here to help her become a huge celebrity before she becomes a famous gymnast.
Saturday
A waitress, two strippers and two stupid Mormons
Lili Arboreen.I'm doing what I can here to help her become a huge celebrity before she becomes a famous gymnast.I never even put the two together: Carolina ...Carolina.В Never even registered that my dad was out there in a state that borders and shares a name with the home state of my favorite local gymnast.
gets like $2,000 a week allowance from her dad, plus she’s got a credit card.) but can’t because their coffee tastes like shit. But there’s no Starbucks anywhere along the coast in Oceanside, so you have to make do with what’s there. , which is the street that runs along the beach. , which is nothing new. is not really a good traffic car.В There are way too many opportunities to get sideswiped or hit outright, and getting a car like that repaired isn’t as easy as taking your Honda in to Joe’s Automotive. , especially when she guns the engine and makes a sound like a demon breaking through the fires of hell.В (That’s just a figure of speech.В There are no demons in hell.В They live inside all the Christians here on earth.) .В (Aimee claims to have had an orgasm when she got it up past 190 one time, but I think she’s just saying that to rattle me.) reason.В We’re basically wallflowers. Aimee’s car is cherry-red.В It’s f**king HOT, and when we’re in a line of traffic like on the Strand and we’re just inching along and she’s pumping the accelerator and that NOISE is coming out of the pipes, everybody within 75 yards or maybe more is looking. after we got tired of driving and making demon sounds. .В Me and my parents have been there a few times, since my mom is FOOD-oriented.В Me and Aimee never went there together. , and we walk down the pier to Ruby’s.В The place is jam-packed all these fat people doing their damndest to get fatter by the minute.В We get seated and start looking at the menu. !»В We get a few looks from these three fat-a*s teenage girls across the aisle, but nothing was said. We both ordered a small vegetable soup and a dinner salad, hold the croutons.В Our waitress was cute but sort of heavy, and you’d think that wouldn’t be the case with as much running around as she does in that place. When she brought our food, Aimee goes, «Isn’t there a strip club around here somewhere?» and the waitress says, «Yeah, down on Coast Highway, like you’re heading toward the harbor.» She gives Aimee a strange look, and Aimee goes, «We’re supposed to meet the head stripper and apply for a job.» The waitress says, «Oh, that’s cool.» Aimee goes, «You think we’d make good strippers?» The waitress laughs and kind of shrugs.В (Not too many people would pay to watch me and Aimee take our clothes off.) pieces of crap but to Aimee they are) and the engine’s about to fall out of it.» .В That is not a joke. The waitress sort of laughs and says, «Well, good luck,» and off she goes. When we were alone, I said, «I can’t believe you said that to her.» She goes, «Why not?В Lexuses are shit, and everybody who ever drove one knows it.» .В Of course neither of us has ever been in there. Out front there were three guys smoking cigarettes and two girls in long white bathrobes.В Aimee goes, «Let’s go talk to them.»В I’m like, «What the hell are we going to talk to them about?»В She goes, «Jobs.»В I said, «We probably can’t even go in there since we’re not twenty-one.» So she unleashes a few demons from the Carerra’s tailpipes and gets everybody’s attention, then we park and get out and walk up to the people loitering in front of the club. Right away one of the girls says, «Hot car!»В One of the guys says, «That’s a GT, right?»В Fully ensconced in her element (i.e., people paying attention to her), Aimee goes, «Yeah, thanks.В It’s just something to drive till I get my truck out of the shop.» Everybody laughed, and I just rolled my eyes. Aimee asked the girls if they worked there, and we found out they did and there is some kind of city ordinance that says strippers can’t hang out in front of the facility unless they have robes on.В I guess Oceanside doesn’t want people to think that there are strippers working at a f**king strip club. Then Aimee asked what you have to do to get a job there.В One of the guys jokingly said, «You gotta look like these two» (meaning the two strippers), and one of the girls said, «Shut up, jack-a*s!»В Then she told Aimee you have to be twenty-one, and you have to be comfortable being naked around a bunch of horny guys. Aimee said she has a fake I.D., but the stripper told her it wouldn’t work, because they do some kind of background check.В The stripper asked me how old I was, and I said fourteen, which I can easily pa*s for. One of the guys laughed, and quickly Aimee goes, «She used to be a prostitute when she lived in South Korea.»В That shut the guy up pretty fast.В The two girls looked at us like there was something wrong with us. To get us out of there, because I was kind of feeling uncomfortable, I said, «Well, maybe we’ll come back when we’re old enough,» and I started walking away.В Aimee said bye to everybody and followed me. One of the guys goes, «Hey, what are you doing later?» and Aimee goes, «Trying to find my husband and that skank whore he’s been f**king!»В We could hear them laughing a little as we went around the corner. understand why I don’t have any breasts, but I think guys who go in those places expect to see a bunch of knockers.» waiting for the light to turn green. , so you knew they were Mormons. Aimee goes, «Are you guys Jehovah’s Witnesses?» They shook their Bart-Conner heads and kind of smiled. .) .» Aimee goes, «Wouldn’t it just be easier to be a Jehovah’s Witness?» I asked them if they were on a mission (because I know a little about the Mormons), and they said they were.В Most Mormon boys have to spend two years or something like that going around and trying to convert people who don’t give a f**k about them or their religion. . could have seduced them. We walked across the street with the Mormons, and Aimee said good luck on their mission, and they said good luck on ours, and Aimee goes, «All we’re doing is trying to find somebody over twenty-one who’ll buy us alcohol.В You guys can’t do that, right?» They said they couldn’t and walked away. So we went to a liquor store and Aimee bought the alcohol with her fake I.D. We’re usually a lot more active here in Oceanside than we are in Malibu.В Probably because we’ve already done everything worth doing up there.В For us, Oceanside is kind of like a vacation. , because I wasn’t sure what I wanted to do with this one.В So the chronology is a little out of order. » video, «I think I got one more in me!»В Watch the song here.В It’s almost as bada*s as Aimee’s car. highway to hell and I’ll be able to pull that «one more» out of me. Sarah!{ * InsideFun * } Small Lake Courthouse Towers - Images & Detail
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